Wednesday, April 01, 2015

Born With It

I believe we are all born with certain tendencies. After giving birth to four boys who have the same parents and live in the same house, I can see some things they are born with. I have one boy who talks incessantly and one you have to pull information out of. Why is that? Nature and nurture are the same for these boys. I believe it is the way the genes shook out this time-they were born that way. Does it make one boy better than the other? I don't believe so. Does it make one boy right and one boy wrong? I don't believe so.

Do I hold both boys to the same standards in our home? Yes I do. Do I expect to be answered every time I address them? Yes, whether you are the boy who likes to talk or the one who doesn't like to talk. If I speak to you, you respond. Regardless of the tendency you were born with, that is irrelevant, you are expected to live up to the standard. Just like I hold them both to the standard of not talking just to hear their own voice or talking over people. 

Now is one of those things easier to comply with for each boy? Yes, they are. 
Do the standards change based on what is easier for an individual boy? No, it does not.
Are standards universal? Yes, they are.

As you can see, I believe a person has the responsibility to control their own actions regardless of the tendencies they have, or "were born with" if you will.

Then comes the issue of standards. I get mine from the Bible. Where do you get yours? 

There are those who have a different belief system or some other framework for standards, and I do not deny them that right. In my belief system God gives us free will. Free will to make both right and wrong choices, free will to adhere to a different system of beliefs and set of standards. But it does not take away my right to my beliefs and standards because someone else thinks them wrong.

Thursday, February 05, 2015


My mom went to my Grandma's for a week to help her clean out and organize her sewing room, among other things. At 81 my Grandma is slowing down on the sewing and knows it is time to cull through some of her accumulated material and stuff. When my mom came back she had a bag of things for me and my sister from my Grandma's purge. One of the things for us was a new bar of Irish Spring soap. Not what we generally use, but as Flylady says "soap is soap" so it made it up to the shower in the soap holder. I didn't think anything more about it.

A few days later Eli and I had the following conversation:
Eli: That bar of new soap in the shower? We should take it out.
Me: Why?
Well it's hand soap.
Why do you say that?
It's in a bar. It's not gooey.
Well it's soap, not shower gel.

Blank stare.

Do you realize that shower gel had to be invented? Like when I was a kid we only had soap in a bar, and someone thought it'd be a good idea to make it gooey like shampoo, but before that, always a bar of soap to get clean.
Ohhhh. As he slowly raises his chin in understanding.

Mercy. Am I that old? My child doesn't know about bar soap. Have I failed him?!?

Tuesday, January 20, 2015


"Mom? Why do we shut our eyes when we sneeze?" Eli asked.

"To keep your eyes from flying out," I replied, without missing a beat.

"Really?!?" he almost yelled as his eyes flew open wide.

I just smirked and shrugged with raised eyebrows.

Monday, December 15, 2014

What's in a nose?

Let me set the stage. We were sitting in church. My mother-in-law's new church to watch the Christmas program.

Jesse was sitting beside me and I saw him pick his nose-I hate that, but I chose to ignore it. A little bit later I see him pick his nose again so I leaned over and say to him quietly, "Do you need a tissue? I'd rather not see you pick your nose."

He looks up at me and as he pulls his finger out of his mouth he says, "Well, it's just that I didn't have much breakfast!" as his voice was quickly turning into a whine.

I frowned at him and whispered, "What does breakfast have to do with picking your nose?"

He frowns back at me and whispers back, "It's just that I'm hungry and there's nothing else to eat."

I just looked at him, puzzled. Then my eyes flew open in surprise and disgust as I realize what he's talking about. He's talking about eating his boogers.

As soon as my eyes go wide Jesse realized what he has really said and he opens his mouth tall in an effort to not smile as he waits to see what I'm going to do. Then since he can't hold back his snicker he starts to cover his face with his hands, all the while watching me to see what my reaction will be.

I can't hold it in, I turn away from him as I start to shake with laughter and the harder I try to hold it in the harder I laugh. You know how that is, the more you try to stop the more funny it becomes until you just can't control it. Pretty soon I was wiping tears from my eyes. Jesse was laughing just as hard beside me. Then all the other boys (and husband) were wanting in on the joke, but I couldn't even talk.

That Jesse.

And note to self: feed the boys more breakfast.

Thursday, October 02, 2014

On Getting Married

I have not been good about blogging this year in 2014 as my life has been crazy busy, even by my standards. But that season is almost over and while we have chosen to be involved in a lot of activities and business ventures, we are working to find a new "normal" once again and I shall be back to blogging with some regularity. I think. I hope.

Some stories must be shared so I don't forget them though. This is one. Jesse, my Jesse. That kid is a piece of work.

A conversation between Jesse and me:

Jesse: Yuck-you and dad doing the smoochy-smooch.
Me: Oh someday you'll get married and do the "smoochy-smooch" with your wife too!
Jesse: No I won't. I'm not going to get married.
Me: Well, maybe someday, but not anytime soon. You need to be a grown up and find the right girl.

A pause in the conversation and I think it is over.

Jesse: No, I changed my mind. I am going to get married.
Me: Oh, okay.
Jesse: Can she work?
Me: You mean your wife?
Jesse: Yeah, can she work? Will she get money?
Me: She can work if you both decide that's what you want. And yes, if she works she'll get paid.
Jesse: Oh good, 'cause I will get money faster.

Oh mercy.
Can you tell we have been working on finances and learning how to save for a long-term goal? Eli & Noah both just saved enough to buy themselves ipods. The younger two do not have that much saved up. Thus they are stuck with merely playing with their DSs and my old tablet.